Stories
Loss to illness
For those who walked alongside a long illness, and those who lost suddenly to one.
The long goodbye
TaniaJune 2026
My husband had motor neurone disease. We had eighteen months from diagnosis, which everyone called a "blessing" because we had "time to prepare." I want to be honest about something people don't say: you can grieve someone while they are still alive. It felt like I lost him in pieces, long before I lost him completely. By the end I was exhausted and carrying so much guilt. What helped, strangely, was someone telling me that the relief I felt when it was finally over did not make me a monster. That it was the relief of a body that had been holding it together for a year and a half. Anticipatory grief is real and so is caregiver burnout. It does not mean you loved them less. It means you loved them through something that was brutal, and really very hard. So please, give yourself grace. We all need it. Especially after everything you have and are still going through.I go to his parent's house every Sunday, and have dinner. And we talk about him. He was an only child.How I honour them
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